just thinking

here’s a bit of my current routine for you:

i wake up at 0655, do a mad dash to the shower (water, shapoo, lather, repeat). i’m usually completely dressed (hair gel’d, eyes done, pants tucked) and walking out the door by 0715. i stumbled over to my smoke pit, do a quick debate on if i want to play a dumb game on my ipod, or read a little on my kindle, and essentially, smoke. i’m at work by 0729 usually.

log on to my work computer, turn on my personal computer. check my email, try and coax facebook to load. open up my spreadsheets, try and read my facemail. every single day i check a calculator we have, often called the donught of misery, but essentially, a count down until this fucking deployment is over. 

our time here is getting closer to being done, which is great for us, but it hit me the other day that the people getting ready to come here are probably sad. their familys are getting in those last minute hugs, the extra kisses, all the bonding. kasihan dong. i remember what it was like, being out and aboot and people would say they’d heard i was deploying, and ask  how much longer til i was leaving. they would smile sadly, hug me, tell me to keep my head down, and offer to buy me a meal or a drink before i left.

so here we are doing an ecstatic count down, while their wives/husbands/parents/kids are holding back tears and being strong etc.

sad.

xx

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~ by manjamanis on November 29, 2009.

2 Responses to “just thinking”

  1. there was a bit of a tear just then. … And you think I’m shallow! ;o) *sigh* it made me think of that face my daughter, Cori, made in the van at the airport right before she buried her face into my momma’s side. She’s so much stronger than she should need to be. I could see her holding back tears as I told her to be strong and look out for her little brother while I was away. … okay. thanks a lot, SuzyQ! criekey.

  2. i bet you’re excited it’s almost over. you don’t know me, but just wanted to say hope all’s going well. stay safe, be careful.

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